Around the world in five tins

I acquired the toasted tuna sandwich habit from my Uncle J., while I was working in his TAB (foreigners: betting shop) in Darwin. In the intervening years, I've tried 74.96% of tinned tunas on the market without finding a superior brand to John West or a finer variety than lemon pepper. But the fishy quest goes on. I was moderately excited when I saw Coles had put out five newies named after countries and with appropriate flavourings: Italian (tomato and basil), Japanese (soy, ginger and wasabi), Mexican (tomato, jalapeno, red kidney beans and sweet corn), Moroccan (tomato, mint and cumin) and Spanish (tomato, green olive and lemon). Alas and alack, they don't taste anywhere near as delicious as they sound. Those that contain tomato are unpleasantly sour, whereas those that don't are bland - mere filler rather than half of a killer combination. Leave them on the shelf, fellow questers.