"I couldn't think of anything to talk about"
In English class at high school, whenever the public speaking component of the syllabus rolled around, someone would inevitably trot out the old "I couldn't think of anything to talk about" speech. They'd go through a list of possible subjects, explain why they'd been forced to eliminate each one, and feign becoming increasingly desperate for a topic. The oration would conclude with a groaner of a gag, eg. the speaker suddenly realising, just as the perfect topic had sprung to mind, that they were out of time. I preferred to talk about things with universal appeal...like Betamax video recorders.
posted by Addster @ 9:53 PM
6 Comments:
I actually remember the speech about being a Betamax owner. I remember your big gag was: "One of the joys of owing a VCR was racing to the video store to check out what was available and then experiencing the overwhelming disappointment of seeing the "Sorry I'm Out" card in the box. If course being a Betamax owner, I never had this problem!". Not sure why I remember this...but I can testify that Mr Wilson also found it funny...
Robert: Didn't you do a talk about the flaws in the Aussie prison system, inspired by the movie "Ghosts Of The Civil Dead"? Or was that Anthony?
David: He sure did find it amusing - I scored 30/30 for that speech. Pity I failed the next one (13/30) for using "props", albeit imaginary ones.
Robert: You are correct in the identity of the above poster. Am (somewhat) in your neck of the woods right now, living in NJ since 2001.
Adam: If you want another public speaking trip even further down memory lane how about: "Today I am going to talk about transportation. There are 5 basic types of transportation..." before completely losing his way and regretting having absolutely NO NOTES...any takers on the identity of the speaker (pretty easy) and for a bonus point, the teacher of the class.
I believe the forgetful orator's intials were RK, which would probably make the teacher RM (second and third guesses: RD, CM.) If I'm in the right era, Robert won't get this as we were at different SFX feeder schools then.
Willow: Correct on both counts.
Robert: I believe that swearing thing might have been in Mr Wilson's class right? I recall many occasions where you and Anthony were completely scornful of him. Not your most favourite teacher if I remember correctly.
Mr Wilson's assembly swear amounted to "it's a shitty job" - something about his having to clean up rubbish people had thrown in the wrong place. Once we realised that meant we were "allowed" to swear in English class, my first words were: "'Kid Stakes' is shit". Mr W. gave me a look that takes a single word to describe: hurt.
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