No-lifing our hobbies

As a death-metal art project: 9/10.

As a practical, comprehensive rulebook: 3/10 (and that's being generous).

For shaking up the TTRPG scene: 7.5/10.

My desire to ever play it: 0/10.

Boris & Natasha

Gets bogged down a couple of times, when covering gaming crackdowns in US government workplaces and the struggle to make competitive "Minesweeper" fair after the discovery of a massively exploitable flaw, but once the editor's tractor pulls him out of the sand, the author is off on another interesting topic. No regrets on my part. Oh, and it was inspired by a Spectrum game!

Let's go, Ura!

Kickstarted an X-rated comic-gamebook by an Italian publisher. The physical tome hasn't arrived yet, but they sent through a .PDF of that....

...along with a regular comic (my censoring below) and sketchbook, plus wallpapers.

Filthy fun, the lot of it. They tried to do something innovative with the gamebook, where Connie speaks to you, the reader, and awards lovehearts to help you progress. It's ultimately a very simple quest, though.

Do I regret backing the project? Nope. Connie is cute and there's a ton of variety in the artwork - saucy "camera angles" galore.

VAR - checking for possible red card

COMIC COVERS OF THE WEEK

The judges have declared it a dead heat between Rick Veitch's trippy depiction of Swampy adrift in time(?) and Zatanna rocking out with her stockings out, courtesy of Adam Hughes. Tnioj srenniw!

SONGS OF THE WEEK

* The country-fied cover of Bomfunk MCs' "Freestyler" by Steve'N'Seagulls (Finland).

* Punk ripper "The Stupidest Animal In The Zoo" by The King Blues (UK).

* "Time For The Needy", more indie-rock gold from Egoism (Australia).

* "Sigui" by Malian-French songstress Fatoumata Diawara. Entrancing. 

* "The Touch" [Reformatted Edition] by Knights Of Unicron feat. Stan Bush (US).

* The beautiful cover of Jaurim's "Twenty-Five, Twenty-One" by Roy Kim (Korea). Only a world-class voice would dare.

* "Junk And Pong" by Asmi (Japan). Appealing sung-spoken pop.

Addster's pick >>> "Twenty-Five, Twenty-One".

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g8SUXEw5LW4

TWO THUMBS UP

I think I said enough about the previous two volumes... This is just as brilliant, slightly funnier and a tad subversive (e.g. the midichlorians reference). Luke shines. Ironically, in translating the trilogy into antiquated, "difficult" verse, Doescher elucidates the motivations at its heart.

ONE THUMB UP

When next you visit the Delphi Oracle, please ask her why I spent cash money on this. Because I don't know. Ah, well, it's read now. Lovely food shots and a few inspiring ingredients/useful techniques, which is the minimum you want from any cookbook. Outsiders might baulk at lines like, "If they can find them, drow prefer matsutake, though shiitake or maitake will do in a pinch," in a description of a mushroom broth favoured by the dark elves. Let's face it, "Heroes' Feast" isn't aimed at those folks. For us "D&D"-ers, the higgledy-piggledy collection of snacks, soups, meat or veg mains, desserts, cocktails, etc. makes perfect sense when the recipes are grouped by fantasy races and linked to fabulous locations.

Golden joypads

Prime newie "Ghost War" is missing only three things: believability, logic and a single original idea. I gotta get my eyeballs on a French or Korean movie soon, 'cos I honestly don't enjoy shooting these barrel fish. Miller acts circles around the others, even if the defining characteristic of her MI6 operative is that she smokes (at least they make a joke about that towards the end). The music isn't bad. The ol' rogue-element-within-our-ranks plotline is just so lazy and boring; a waste of time. Do some effing research and come up with a topical scenario! Or is it a case of the makers being scared to offend any particular country for fear of losing viewers? Then they should use a fictional analogue like DC Comics does - Bialya, Markovia, etc. - while sticking to themes which are relatable.

What if your Uber...

...was an itasha with underglow and a boot full of thumping stereo? Yeah, that'd rule.

--

BEER OF THE WEEK

Smooth. Right level of flave for a lager. No chemical after-taste. Large and in charge!

No string theories attached

When it comes to espionage tales, I am not so discerning. Which was just as well in the case of "The Copenhagen Test". It began silly - the protagonist is a spy whose brain has been hacked - and continued being silly for eight episodes, adding or changing *anything* just to provide frequent twists. Simu Liu's mindfucked agent, Alexander Hale, was likeable enough, as was Melissa Barrera's mysterious Michelle (apart from when she wasn't). I didn't care for the rest of the charas. Or the worldbuilding. I didn't care for the flashbacks. I certainly didn't care for the weak, illusion-of-progress ending. Furthermore, the series had zero of note to say about real intelligence organisations or geopolitics. I'm surprised the reviews I've seen weren't harsher. Gods help us if actual spy agencies waste resources like the clowns depicted in "T/C/T" do monitoring/attempting to control one unlucky dude.

Futterbingers

Apparently this 1982 biopic was a box-office flop. Unless it tried to directly take on "E.T.", it didn't deserve to be. Strong Australian cast, well scripted (satisfying arc), well filmed, impressive period trappings, infectious musical score... On top of all that, it offers a theory on the death of the diminutive gangster, about which the precise details remain unclear to this day. Atkins utterly inhabits the title role, putting his real-life dance skills to good use, and it's wild seeing local acting royalty Weaver play a ditzy "moll" (she nails it). Bisley makes an evil baddie, too. While I generally shy away from media that glorifies criminals, ST's rise to power was so unlikely and his boldness so outrageous - whether addressing a crime boss, copper, reporter or judge - and the film gives such a feel for the time/place, I'd rate this flick as watch-worthy for any Aussies interested in the darker side of our history.

Take two lances and call me at the dawning

A lot of my schooling was rote learning, and a lot of the assignments my classmates and I submitted were little more than pages of text copied by hand - verbatim - from reference works, punctuated with the occasional lame drawing or photocopied image. I'll never forget a fellow student hiding a cheeky message in the middle of such an assignment, asking the teacher to make a mark to show he was still reading. When it was graded and returned to her, there was no mark. In an even cheekier move, she called him on it. His excuse: "I didn't want to mess up that page by writing in the middle of the text." None of us bought that for a second.

Thomas J. Foolery

COMIC COVER OF THE WEEK

By Tula Lotay (Lisa Wood). Google tells me that, along with having a knack for pretty faces, she founded the biggest comics convention in the UK!

SONG OF THE WEEK

"Spy In The House Of Love" by Exploring Birdsong (UK). Are they progressive? Maybe. Doesn't matter a jot - easily one of my tracks of the year.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YM9ZBblQn9o

Commended >>>

* "El Award Es Para" by Aiko El Grupo (Spain)

* "It's For The Kids" by Anthrax (US)

* "Better Than Before" by Pamela (Australia)

* "I'm Out And I Wanna Go Home" by Dadi Freyr (Iceland)

* "Falling Into You" by Tadpole (NZ)

* "Stay" by Seeya (Korea) - if you like clips with dancing, the dancer in this'un is exceptional.

ANNOYING RPG MANUAL OF THE WEEK

Rad concept: A rules-light scifi game of overthrowing an evil galactic empire where the character sheets are modelled after carded "Star Wars" action figures. Shame they go on and bloody on about the parallels to current-day politics. I'm a liberal lefty and I still found it obnoxious. Anyhoo, too simple to run as a campaign but I'd probably play it once at a con.

Righto, time to breakfast and await the Rousey vs Carano MMA card...

Multiples of seven

Well done to the Lady Blues on winning the Origin series on Thursday night.

BEVERAGE OF THE WEEK

Heaps nice! Way better than their regular beers.

BOOK WOT I READED

The definitive "Day Of The Tentacle" resource? Yes. Weakest Boss Fight Books title I have bought so far? Also yes. It's short and mainly comprised of (cleverly) stitched-together interview quotes.

DOCO I VIDDIED

Movie-length 2025 report. First-rate journalism, i.e. comprehensive, while letting the subjects and their opponents/critics/supporters/external monitors speak for themselves. Despite being distributed under the PBS banner, it's Oz-made.

Rodent content

The first proper magazine at which I was employed had a weekly column of strange/spooky news items from around the planet allegedly compiled and written by the editor's pet rat. I loaned him (the ed, not the rodent wordsmith) the powerful Bryan Talbot GN "The Tale Of One Bad Rat". I was disappointed that he thought it was only all right.

Ten steps away, toiling on another publication, sat a woman who'd become my drinking buddy for a while. She told me her nickname at home was Ratty. I don't believe it was looks-related - she was attractive and dressed stylishly. I think she must have been the untidy sort. Unless she chewed holes in food packaging, which seems unlikely.

I could give this post a combination geekness-Rule Of Three conclusion by revealing how, while interacting with the folks above, I was busily honing a Skaven army for "Warhammer". Except I wasn't. But I later met a bloke who worked on the handbook. And I now own "The Horned Rat" AND "The Horned Rat Companion". Too tenuous? Rats!

One bounce and over the rope for four

Should finish this memoir / political commentary / instructional text today. Rambling yet readable. Eye-opening at times. Perhaps overly ambitious in scope. I think when I'm done I'll still prefer Coates' earlier work, "Between The World And Me". At the risk of lowering the tone, I also thought his run on Marvel's "Black Panther" was something special.

Speaking of lowering the tone... Doubt I'll finish this slot-machine roguelite today, although I'll defo sink one or two hours into the addictive bastard. Loads of lucky charms to unlock.

Will finish this 2025 modernisation of Ibsen's play over lunch (vego nachos). It's frankly terrible. Disjointed, unconvincing, tiresome. A travesty! And I normally really like Tessa T.

Growing a ratto

Binged S1 of "Invincible" and there's no question of me not continuing. I can understand the appeal; the hype accompanying successive seasons, the figurines, the cosplayers... This isn't your average boy-discovers-he-has-superpowers-then-must-learn-to-employ-them-wisely chronicle. I mean, it is sort of that. But with a stellar voice cast*, hip soundtrack, the shockingest shocks (if the climax of Episode 1 doesn't grab you, nothing will), messy adult situations, subplots that don't wait for the hero to be ready, and absolutely BRUTAL fights that always have nasty consequences. In an entertainment world where "Spider-Man" is about to be reset for the 50th time, so they can ultimately feed us the same ol' crap over again, it's refreshing to enter a fantasy universe where we don't already know the heroes and villains and NPCs, their backstories, the secret organisations, the monsters, the aliens, the limits of magic and technology, Earth history to that point, and even dramatic stuff such as who is "meant to" end up with whom. As gobsmacking as Ep. 1's twist was, it barely compares to what transpires in Ep. 8. And why leave us with a single ominous glimpse of a future threat, makers of "Invicible", when you can pummel us with six or seven in a row? Crikey.

*Check it out: Yeun, Oh, Simmons, Jacobs, Beetz, Goggins, Flockhart, Quinto, Hamill, Dorn, Rogen, Maslany, Burton, Pace, Delaney, Mara, Bradley, Campbell, Mulgrew, etc, etc.)

Beat "Forbidden Solitaire" in a sitting (good and bad endings, 29/30 achievos). The premise is that you stumble onto a banned horror-themed puzzle game from the days of CD-ROM - that you weren't allowed to have as a kid - and gleefully begin playing. Meanwhile, equally nostalgic-curious, your sister starts researching the firm responsible for the title and the surrounding controversy, regularly messaging you her findings (video as well as photos and clippings). On that note, the game's cut scenes are presented in the more-goofy-than-scary, blood-splattered graphics we all remember from the '90s, and the main screen is a retro desktop. The solitaire itself is solid, with location stages and battles, various card corruptions, different types of joker being steadily unlocked, plus a wide array of permanent powerups - which take the form of gems embedded in your hand! - available for a purchase from an eyeball behind a wall. They do that thing where the game grows glitchier towards the climax, as if incomplete or haunted or both. Will it crash? Will it suck you in? The story of the dodgy goings-on at the fictional company actually sucked me in, surprisingly. Be prepared for a few "false finishes" (to borrow a pro-wrestling term) as the action becomes increasingly surreal, then enjoy a "Portal"-style closing-credits song that reminded me of '70s prog rock if you manage to attain the good ending.

Checkers wrestling

COMIC COVER OF THE WEEK

By Jeffrey Alan Love. If your city's going to be stomped, it might as well be by a giant naked sword lady with tentacle (data cable?) hair.

SONG OF THE WEEK

"It's Me" by Illit (Korea). Who's my bias? I haven't decided, but this very meta song sure is infectious. Note: All members are 18 or older. Otherwise, there's no way I'd be running the above group shot.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bMhDJ0S0OBA

Commended >>> "I Feel Fantastic" by 8485 (Canada) - retro-cyberpop brilliance. "Without You" by Appleby (US) - so sweet and uplifting. Instantly subscribed to both artists.

FOND FAREWELL OF THE WEEK

As with the previous fillum, the sources of conflict are dealt with fairly effortlessly as soon as the plot requires them gone. "The Grand Finale" isn't about that. It's about spending a last two hours with characters we've grown to adore over the course of 15 years. And, to a lesser extent, documenting the decline of the UK's Great Houses. Lady Mary forever! She's my bias :-)

VINTAGE-MODULE UPDATE OF THE WEEK

Typical of seemingly everything Jennell Jaquays wrote, this compact 1979 adventure - originally designed for "RuneQuest", but here converted to modern "D&D" - is more logical, interesting and just plain visionary than the majority of its contemporaries. Which is not to say it's perfect. I penned several changes and additions in my copy, e.g. I'd increase the chance of finding Dungeon Dressing items to 100% in each specified location. Because the boss can appear early (and thus things could wrap early), there's no reason to deny the players the fun and mystery of these objects.

NON-FIC PICK OF THE WEEK

Unlikely page-turner. Cynical Addster reckons you could compile this type of history of influence about any long-established nation. Appreciative Addster says, "Yes, but how many authors could weave together a millennium of key events so skilfully, with never a dull moment (in fact, umpteen amusing ones) and conveying such a strong sense of place?" I was already fascinated by Iceland and its inhabitants, and am even keener to visit the joint now.

Oil your bike chain

2025. Don't watch this scifi-survival tale for Milla alone - she's in less than half of it. Most of the film is a father teaching his child how to stay alive on an Earth where killer creatures have spawned from the depths to punish humanity for destroying the environment. Which is ironic since, by the finale, the viewer has learnt nothing we didn't know in the first 10 minutes. Don't get me wrong, "Worldbreaker" isn't trash. There are plenty of touching scenes. It just feels like an heroic B-grade actioner spliced together with a gritty, inevitably tragic indie in such a way that it fails on either count. To end on a positive, I'll add that Luke Evans and Billie Boullet are both good in their roles as dad and daughter.

1973. Appropriately nonsense poster for a pointless runaround involving stolen diamonds, Russian spies and British politicians. Why the fuchsia would you cast Paul Newman in an English flick as an undercover operative pretending to be Australian? Dominique Sanda's casting is arguably worse. The only thing that keeps you watching is the sheer loopiness of the plot, with its extended court/jail sequences, middle section that reminds of "The Prisoner" and random trip to Malta. There's also a wild country-road car chase that was probably a stipulation in PN's contract (admittedly, it feels genuinely dangerous). Zero chemistry between the leads doesn't help, despite her jumping straight into bed with him as if he was 007.

KIT OF THE WEEK: A LEGO delivery truck? So meta that I couldn't resist. The forklift definitely fits the theme, but I wonder why they threw in a hotdog stand.

SET MEAL OF THE WEEK: What the chicken cutlet lacked in quality the, er, rice made up for in quantity, extending under that curry sauce like an iceberg (riceberg?). The Lemon Yuzu Asahi was pleasant enough to have again. Next time, I'll plump for tempura over katsu.

Pet rawk

Want to feel old? Pokemon turns 30 this year, the movie "Highlander" is 40, double live album "All The World's A Stage" by Rush is 50, game company Sega is 65, and the marvellous Sir David Attenborough just hit 100.

The squalor of a scholar

1983. An excellent Ian Richardson can no longer save this dated, padded, distinctly un-mysterious telemovie. 3/10

2024. There are levels to the horror game. "Exhuma" is on the highest. Riveting, deeply strange, unpredictable. 9/10

WIMP interface

Four-story set from 2021. Basically, it's UNIT and friends (Harry Sullivan!) versus The Eleven, a mad Time Lord whose past regenerations all persist within his mind, arguing and vying for control. The overarching plot about an extremely dangerous alien artifact allows for exciting exploration, disaster prevention, heist foiling and a rather effective shock. Tom Baker on form as The Curator (from "The Day Of The Doctor"). 

Wrong time of year for a summer ale, which is probably why I got it cheap. Made in WA. Clean taste. A bit bitter and a bit fruity. Actually very balanced. It could be a nicer-than-usual session beer. No artificial shit, so the headache might not be as bad, either.

May the 4th be with you!

Have a heartwarming and hilarious day.

Enterprise Bingo

COMIC COVER OF THE WEEK

By Jesse Lonergan. Quirky. Makes me think: "folk art".

SONG OF THE WEEK

"Born To Die" by Shaboozey (US). Super-slick, super-catchy country.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QA2vzqQ_CG8

ASSEMBLED DURING UFC PERTH

Deceptively complex underneath. That's Technic for ya.

Melancholy-glot

What is this overlong film trying to be? Dystopian scifi? Black comedy? Wacky crime yarn (the double-crossing partner and escaping-an-angry-mobster cliches)? Twisted romance? Satire of a certain type of populist politician/religious leader and their moronic followers? Colonisation/first-contact scifi? Statement on the plight - and expendability - of "ordinary" workers? Plea for us to truly value every individual (and their potential to achieve great things against the odds)? I dunno whether to criticise "Mickey 17" for trying to be too many things at once or praise it for almost managing the feat. It even kinda-sorta includes a musical number.

Bland on its own (low carb-ers generally are), decent accompanying food as it doesn't interfere with the flavours. AND gives me an excuse to post a link to this gorgeous track about a different Travla -

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3b6WRqcPVCs 

I saw the clock change into a sundial

Read this. Shoulda done so when it was new (2023). Ate up the background, especially when they discussed the program's "compositions" with real poets. However, said texts were mostly dull, what would be labelled laughably pretentious coming from a human author, or plain garbage. There were a small number of arresting lines - in hindsight, not enough to justify slogging through the entire collection of poems. No doubt a machine could fabricate way better now.

DG recommended this two-part doco about forgeries and faked provenance. (Made by the ABC, but also available on Netflix.) Could have had 20 minutes of repetition cut, yet fascinating nonetheless. Cast of colourful art-world identities, including one so slippery even the cops seemed impressed. Ultimately, it reminded me of the early days of hacking, when judges and juries didn't necessarily understand the significance of technical details - and crims often got off lightly.

More anime yays: "The Drops Of God" and - guilty pleasure - "Haibara's Teenage New Game+". Also finally gave "Reborn As A Vending Machine..." a chance and found I like it. Slowly making my way through the at-present two-and-a-bit seasons.

Speaking of Dostoevsky fine art, all of the finalists for the latest Archibald, Wynne and Sulman Prize competitions are available to view here -

https://www.artgallery.nsw.gov.au/whats-on/exhibitions/archibald-wynne-and-sulman-prizes-2026/

The Archies field is fantastic this year! I can't pick a favourite. Just as well nobody asked for my effing opinion :-)