Dante's inferno

Kevin Smith's "Clerks II" screenplay sat in a pile of comics on my bedroom floor for a week before I picked it up. I didn't put it back down till I'd reached the in-joke at the end of the credits. Why was I so captivated?

I don't think it was the story, which is a simple premise with an inevitable conclusion. The Quick Stop convenience store from "Clerks" burns down, so Dante and Randal seek alternative employment flipping burgers at Mooby's. Meanwhile, Dante's been offered an instant new life in Florida - marriage, home, career - by his hot-but-totally-controlling fiancee Emma. Naturally, Randal doesn't want him to go. Neither does his cool-and-totally-not-controlling boss Becky. And, if he's honest with himself, Dante doesn't really wanna go, either...

A measure of the script's appeal lies in the main characters. Dante, to borrow Smith's words, is "the perfect straight man" - a guy who doesn't go outta his way to attract attention or piss people off but just gets on with things. Randal, although well-intentioned, can't help being cynical, engages mouth before brain and will blurt out your sexual secrets at the worst possible second. The strength of the pairing is that, at the end of the working day, the two can forgive each other anything.

The supporting cast is also highly entertaining. Jay and Silent Bob loiter outside this store just as they did the old one, having found God but lost none of their filthy stoner charm. Emma is the designer babe all fanboys wish they had the chance to turn down; Becky the rare chick who'll put up with pop-cultural obsessions and childish pranks and see the inherent good in a slacker like Dante. Bottom-rung Mooby's staffer Elias is naive and innocent a la Woody from "Cheers", but in a unique Christianity-meets-Transformers-worship way. Unlike in real life, every customer is memorable.

However... As much as "Clerks II" made me care about and laugh with its cartoony characters, the thing I like best of all is the message between the dialogue: that it doesn't matter if you're stuck in a boring/repetitive/low-paying job, there's no limit to what you can imagine and discuss - or the richness of your friendships. That's the spirit in which Kevin Smith makes movies and why I'll watch (or read) anything he does.

Except "Jersey Girl".