The discount emporiums awaken

Rey? No way! -

Genius choc -

Edit: While they coulda done with more popping candy inside, those li'l Death Stars were delish! I got mine for $2.50 at The Reject Shop, Bondi Junction. The bootleg figures were at a non-chain d/e in the mall.

"Well, in the book it says..."

In the pre-internet days of my adolescence, the first time you heard about a new film was often when you saw the poster thumbtacked below a "COMING SOON" banner at the local cinema. However, there was a way to be ahead of the game...

Movie novelisations tended to reach Australia weeks or even months before the flicks that they - with varying degrees of accuracy - represented. If your imagination was up to the challenge, they were almost like a preview screening.

While there wasn't a bookstore within cooee of my home, the newsagency had a substantial display of books running along one wall. And every now and then, a mysterious movie novelisation would materialise on the bottom shelf.

As a voracious reader, impatient (genre) film buff and insufferable know-it-all, I absolutely ADORED them. I bought several and borrowed those that I either hadn't seen for sale or hadn't been able to afford from the public library.

I read them over and over again, memorised the cast and crew credits that usually appeared on the cover, studied the colour stills in the middle of the book... If anything, novelisations made me more excited to see the flicks themselves.

When that day came, I'd walk into the cinema with an air of smugness. Although I wouldn't spoiler my buddies beforehand, I'd drop hints on request - and bore them afterwards with all of the subtle differences between print and screen incarnations.

Based on the number of occasions I revisited them, my top five movie novelisations were: "The Goonies", "War Games", "E.T." (I also loved the unfilmed sequel, "The Book Of The Green Planet"), "The Last Starfighter" and "Explorers".

It's painfully obvious now what those titles had in common - everyday kids escaping from their everyday lives and doing extraordinary things. Like uncovering the secrets of a "major motion picture" before it had even been released!

Gear (Part 1)

The weather-beaten sign hanging down from the wooden roof of the squat stone building read “Adventuring Supplies”. There were no opening times posted in the barred, thickly curtained windows or on the iron-bound door. This was frontier country and if a group of adventurers was on its way to the village – which was called Penrik's Rest, but not for the reason you might think – and then on to the wild lands, there'd be plenty of warning from the towns nearer to civilisation. By signal fire or pigeon or magical message. And if the adventurers were travelling in the opposite direction, having survived their expedition, they'd have little need of supplies, so the store might as well stay closed.

The owner and sole operator of the business was August September. He was of medium height and build, with brown hair and eyes, and plain features. He dressed in simple clothes, more like those of a farmer than a merchant. There was something about him, though... Something about the lightness of his movement, the keenness of his gaze and the smile always lurking at the corners of his mouth. It was as if his body was a perfectly fitting disguise and wearing it was a constant source of amusement to him. Privately, people might have suggested he had elf blood, had all of those tricksters not been exterminated centuries before. Whatever August's origins, his range of gear and level of knowledge were unmatched, making Penrik's Rest one of the most popular foray points into the wild lands in all of the kingdom.

Overnight, word had reached August that a band of adventurers was en route from Mossbridge, which is why sunrise found him unlocking the iron-bound door and opening one set of the thick curtains. It didn't do to let too much sun into the place as there were things that could spoil or even explode. There were also things liable to complain about their slumber being disturbed. That was a peculiarity of the shop – items were grouped together by what they were, not whether they were expensive or enchanted. A jewelled rapier that solved riddles in an aristocratic accent hung between a pair of common longswords. A potion of troll control sat next to a bottle of hay fever remedy. A map leading to the greatest treasure horde for miles around was currently being used as a bookmark in a collection of romantic poetry.

August liked things this way for a few reasons. He liked it because he believed keeping all of one's valuable possessions together was doing half of a thief's work for them. He liked it because it wasn't always obvious which items were powerful and which ordinary. Seeing where a customer's eye or hand were drawn gave him vital information about them. The third reason August liked having all of his stock on view at all times was because that's what worked for him. As far as anyone knew, he'd never been robbed, despite living alone in the back of the building and dealing with adventurers – that exceedingly dangerous and desperate breed – on a regular basis. They were wrong, of course, but his losses were rare and he hid them well.

Telly roll

Allow me to recommend the three-part BBC documentary "Armada", which makes Spain's attempted 1588 invasion of England feel like it's happening while you watch, and which contains some genuinely new information about key figures. Am also enjoying the Beeb adaptation of John Le Carre's "The Night Manager" - a strong cast (Hugh Laurie is a convincing villain!) and tension out the wazoo. Finally, my guilty pleasure at the moment is competitive Brit reality show "The Great Pottery Throw Down". Who would have thought moulding, firing and decorating lumps of clay could be so enthralling?

Full disclosure

My erstwhile coworker and unofficial subediting mentor, XS, has begun blogging his very musical life. Yes, I'm biased, but I reckon it's wonderful storytelling. Scroll to the bottom and work your way up -

https://chrisstaffordblog.wordpress.com/

Forty bucks

Growing up in Port Stephens, the local newspaper was "The Examiner". It was pretty typical fare. What I liked about it was that you could put an ad in the classifieds for free. The catch being that the item(s) had to be $40 or under.

I'm sure I wasn't the only person who knowingly sold stuff for less than it was worth just to fit it into this section. Like a stack of regular "Mad" magazines and specials. Those were purchased while the paper was still hot off the press by a man who claimed they were for his nephew.

And like an Atari 2600 with two joysticks and half a dozen cartridges. Can't remember who nabbed that bargain.

And like a hard-ridden Cobra BMX. Funnily enough, it went to a mate's younger brother who wasn't aware I wanted to sell it 'til he saw the gratis advert. But not before he got me to do a little work on the bike.

He expected a lot for his $40, that kid. I blame "The Examiner".