Dork Geek Nerd

"Rational romantic mystic cynical idealist"

Thursday, September 27, 2007

Data dump

* The best thing I've read in 2007 by a country light-year is Stuart Maconie's "Pies And Prejudice: In Search Of The North". A more incisive travelogue and better balance between literate and hip, history lesson and anecdote, you will not find.

* Yay for basketball season! My Sydney Kings have already beaten the new Gold Coast Blaze franchise and the Townsville Crocs (just). There are a few Wednesday night games coming up that I'll be doing my darndest to attend.

* Yesterday, I had a lunch of three entrees at Sakura in Pitt St that included renkon chips - fried slices of lotus root dusted with shichimi powder. The closest food I can compare 'em to is paprika potato crisps, except these things are naturally patterned with holes.

* Stephen Fry now has an online journal - www.stephenfry.com/blog - and it's techy as. The lengthy first entry is about SmartPhones. (PB: You'll love it! SC: Thanks for the heads-up.)

* I've been watching some yohoho DVDs this week, courtesy of GH. "Death Proof" floored me like the accelerator under Stuntman Mike's boot and I look forward to purchasing the deluxe edition and hearing Tarantino explain all the in-jokes. "The Ultimate Fighter 4" also rawks.

* The final issue of "Dungeon" was sweet, but the last-ever ish of "Dragon" is pure sugar. It's worth the inflated cover price ($20!) for the "Unsolved Mysteries Of D&D" article alone. The disappearance of writer Carl Sargent is freaky!

* Those online bookstores based on either side of the Atlantic continue to lure the cash from my wallet. Nicholas Christopher's intriguing novel "The Bestiary" latterly joined the other 17 items jostling for position on my Amazon US Wish List...

* It's surprising how much the new Siouxsie album "Mantaray" doesn't suck, which is a credit to her backing band, really. Far be it from me to tell the grandma of goth to put down the mic, but her stuff's more cabaret than cutting edge these days. (Cheers, LA.)

* Are you guys following "The Guild" on YouTube? Ya ruddy well should be! It's a send-up of "World Of Warcraft" junkies that stars Felicia Day aka Vi from "Buffy The Vampire Slayer". There are three eps so far. Sorry if I mentioned it already.

* Card bought, hair cut, speech printed. I'm sorted for the wedding :-)

Movie review: "The Kingdom" (2007)

When an enclave of US citizens in the Kingdom Of Saudia Arabia is bombed by terrorists, the FBI uses political blackmail to get four special agents flown over there – without the permission or knowledge of its own government – and involved in the Saudi police investigation.

A ridiculous premise, I know. But for a dumb revenge flick, "The Kingdom" has its merits. The Yank quartet – team leader Fleury (Jamie Foxx), forensics specialist Mayes (Jennifer Garner), intelligence analyst Leavitt (Jason Bateman) and demolition expert Sykes (Chris Cooper) – are appealing for their down-to-earth characters and lack of flag waving or one-liners.

As endearing if not more so are their Saudi minders and co-investigators, Colonel Faris Al Ghazi (Ashraf Barhom) and Sergeant Haytham (Ali Suliman), striving to solve the case, placate their paranoid superiors (the terrorists used cop uniforms) and make sure the foreigners behave.

I was left wondering what the story might have been like without the FBI angle – so that it wasn't just another case of America vs the Arab world, but rather a study of the relationship between moderates and extremists within the one country. Sadly, that's a film far less people would wanna see.

Spectacularly shot, "The Kingdom" does succeed in making you feel you're in an alien land. It also builds a real sense of danger before the badda-badda of machine guns and whoosh-BOOM of rocket-propelled grenades. There’s even a moral footnote, though I reckon it was lost on the morons at the screening I attended - they applauded whenever the Hollywood stars hit their targets.

Final word: A far-fetched firefight you *will* soon forget.

[Australian cinema release date: October 11]

Monday, September 24, 2007

I owe youse

Reviews of "The Heartbreak Kid" (NOT a remake of the Aussie teacher-student romance) and "The Kingdom" when I get a ghost of a chance. Chrissy deadlines have already kicked in at work, so we only gots four days to produce the next mag. Also, I need to take care of some beeswax before the wedding of JH and SB this weekend, viz. buy a non-sappy card, have a fight with a lawnmower, and write out my best man speech in nice big letters that'll be legible after a few cleansing ales.

Sunday, September 23, 2007

Exercising my right to brag

I scored a cool-and-soon-to-be-cooler "Family Guy" freezer mug - with a pic of Evil Monkey on the side - for winning the eight-man poker tourney at JH's remarkably civilised bucks' do in Charlestown on Saturday night. I'm thinking of turning pro :-)

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Movie review: "Hot Rod" (2007)

Man-child Rod Kimble ("Saturday Night Live"'s Andy Samberg) has regular basement brawls with his stepdad Frank ("Deadwood"'s Ian McShane), in an unsuccessful bid to win the toughnut's respect. When the old bloke's laid low by a dicky ticker, it looks like Rod will never get a chance to best him in a fight. Our hero's solution? To raise 50 grand for a heart transplant by charging people to watch him jump 15 buses on a motorcycle!

That might not sound like the most obvious way to earn greenbacks, except that Rod's spent his life attempting foolhardy stunts in memory of his biological father, who he believes was a test rider for Evel Knievel. Just 'cos those jumps all ended in bone-crunching failure won't stop him and his team – consisting of a nerdy brother, two redneck mates and love interest Isla Fisher ("Wedding Crashers") – trying again.

"Hot Rod" feels like a Will Ferrell comedy. Samberg plays the same sorta weirdly likeable underdog, prone to bizarre utterances, lacking the shame gene, and with the indestructibilty of a cartoon character. While Rod could never exist in our world, he fits right into this one – where townsfolk suddenly break into song'n'dance numbers (John Farnham's "You're The Voice"!) and the big stunt is broadcast live on AM radio by a DJ who delivers a show-stealing rant involving tattoos and twin streams of urine.

Final word: "Napoleon Dynamite" meets "Talladega Nights"...to discuss "Jackass".

[Australian cinema release date: October 11]

Sunday, September 16, 2007

Art for art's sake

From the Art Gallery Of NSW to the MCA (via the Wagamama restaurant in Bridge St for yasai gyoza, yasai katsu curry and Shanghai Beer) to the Powerhouse Museum.

Or, in terms of temporary exhibits, from the retrospective on figure sculptor Sir Edgar Bertram Mackennal (1863-1931) and "Chinese Jade From The Forbidden City" to "Primavera 07: Exhibition By Young Australian Artists" to "Improving Life: The Design Of Swedish Innovations" and "Cinema India: The Art Of Bollywood".

Highlight reel: Addster shrinks before an imposing statue of a naked Circe (no fair - she had a pedestal!); hunts for the Nine Elders Of Huichang in a carved jade mound that would make the finest Games Workshop modellers weep; turns up his nose at an installation of broken packing crates, then admires the work of Queenslander Martin Smith (window-sized photos with lines of lyrics or prose punched out. The letters spilled on the floor below); concludes the Swedes are too busy saving lives (perfecting the pacemaker and dialysis machine) to perform menial tasks (hence their robotic vacuum cleaner and lawn mower); and boggles at Bollywood's take on "ET", "Koi... Mil Gaya", a musical romance - of course - about a "developmentally disabled" man who meets an alien that embodies aspects of the Hindu gods!

Saturday, September 15, 2007

This week, I have been mostly reading...

...tomes with a colon in their title.

* "Enid Blyton: The Biography" by Barbara Stoney (1974, updated 2006) - EB's prolific, well-intentioned writing remains entirely defensible. Due to an emotionally deprived upbringing, however, the same can't be said for her behaviour as a parent or an employer.

* "Ghost Rider: Travels On The Healing Road" by Neil Peart (2002) - Diary of the drummer/lyricist for Canadian progressive rock band Rush, whose response to the tragic deaths of his teenage daughter and, 10 months later, her grieving mother was to jump on his motorbike and criss-cross North and Central America; pushing himself physically, while looking to nature, literature and old friends for reasons to keep living. Broken-hearted poetry in motion.

* "Bigger Deal: A Year On The New Poker Circuit" by Anthony Holden (2007) - Sequel to his classic "Big Deal". See my June 8 blog entry.

The last larf

WEDNESDAY: Zimbabwe pull Australia's trousers down at cricket's Twenty20 World Championship in South Africa, winning by 5 wickets.

THURSDAY: During England's 50-run defeat of Zimbabwe, the following exchange takes place between commentators Ian Chappell (former Oz captain) and Nasser Hussain (former Pom captain).

IC - "Sometimes that can happen - you give everything to beat a really good side and then you're just flat; you just can't find anything the next day."

NH - "Well, let's be honest, Chappelli, yesterday would have just been a warm-up for today's match for Zimbabwe. To stroll past Australia and then [face] the real threat in the group, England, come on."

IC - "Yeah. I mean, you always...you always warm up against a strong side, and then you're ready for the no-hopers that follow."

NH - "Australia should be all right, then."

(Transcribed from my recording of the game.)

FRIDAY: Australia crush England like bugs, winning by 8 wickets and topping the group.

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

"Opened for inspection"

I just received a brilliant care package from my sister AC that contains Japanese savoury snacks, lollies, choccies* and - for the "Naruto" fans among you - a figurine of Kakashi Hatake. Although the contents were clearly labelled, it was opened by the Australian Quarantine and Inspection Service. They didn't nick anything, and repacked and resealed the box neatly. Can't grumble about that. But I'm curious to know why they searched it in the first place. The foodstuffs are all manufactured and individually wrapped. There shouldn't have been any fishy odours to attract the sniffer beagles, which suggests the X-ray machines flagged something. Maybe they suspected the toy - which came unassembled in a "gashapon" capsule - was a ball of drugs. I guess figure collecting can be addictive...

*Rockmelon-flavoured KitKats!

Rock'n'stroll?

Approaching a bloke who was pushing a stroller, I noticed the toddler inside was wearing headphones. My initial thought was that it must be a weird way of protecting sensitive ears. Nosireebob. As we passed each other, I was horrified to see the mite holding an iPod that was playing! Setting aside that I'm dead against foisting technology on very young children, as DL remarked when I described the scene, "By the time that kid grows up, its hearing will already be ruined."

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

What's in a name?

I use an alias at the laundromat. It wasn't intentional. The first time I left a bag of washing there, I filled out the card by putting my surname first. Dunno why. So that's what they called me (dropping the "s" on the end). I didn't point out the error 'cos I thought it was cool having a secret identity. I kept meaning to... Eight years later, it's too late to speak up. As well as the laundry staff, one or two locals I've met while doing laundry know me by the wrong name - including a 40ish woman I chat with at the bus stop now and then. Unless I'm mistaken, she was on the verge of asking me on an innocent sort of date yesterday. Which is also cool. But what will happen if I reveal the deception? I'll look like a total shonk, that's what!

Friday, September 07, 2007

Crosswords, Colts

PG had to meet DG at the airport early this morning, so he crashed at mine. We rented the slick, star-studded doco "Wordplay", about the "New York Times" crossword, then co-operatively played the Nintendo DS game based on the puzzle. Like the genuine article, it starts out relatively easy on Monday and gets tricksier than Gollum as the week progresses. PG and I had to hoist the white flag on the Thursday crossword. It was late and our brains were hurting.

Today was an excellent day not to have to work (due to the transport problems caused by APEC and its many motorcades). It meant I could watch the whole live telecast of the NFL season opener - the Indianapolis Colts at home to the New Orleans Saints. I wasn't overflowing with confidence after the Colts' pre-season record (1-3). Things were tight for the first half, then Peyton Manning and company clicked and we sprinted away with it, 41-10.

Wednesday, September 05, 2007

So much cool stuff online

Catchy choon, clever lyrics, quirky celebs. Brad Paisley's song "Online" has been around for a fair while, but when CMC played the video this evening, I thought it might be nice to share with anyone who hasn't already had the pleasure.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=7GcVnhNjWV0

Tuesday, September 04, 2007

A bit of Pete and Dudley

In 1971, Peter Cook and Dudley Moore brought their comedic stylings to Oz. During their tour, the pair filmed a two-part special that screened on the Nine Network. Apparently, it wasn't repeated until 2005 when an edited version entitled "Pete And Dud: The Lost Tapes" aired in Britain. Now the uncut shows are available on the DVD "Behind The Fridge" (as opposed to "Beyond The Fringe", a 60s theatrical revue in which Cook and Moore starred).

Contrary to what it says on the case, the black-and-white footage runs for about two hours. The production's largely studio-bound, the sets/props are rudimentary and, apart from a flashback sequence featuring a hot babe, there are no other performers. And yet it enthralls. This is "A Bit Of Fry and Laurie" (which I adore, don't get me wrong) done 15 years earlier, weaving intellectual satire and absurdity in lengthier, semi-improvised(?) skits, and with better piano playing.

Monday, September 03, 2007

Prime-time entertainments

"Metroid Prime Pinball" (Nintendo DS): This combination pinball/shooter from 2005 has a perfect learning curve - whenever I'm on the verge of quitting, I make a little more headway. Now scoring in the region of 3.5 million, with 3/4 bonus tables unlocked and the Big Bad (to borrow a Buffy-ism) in my sights. A thumping theme tune means it rocks as well as...no, that pun's too lame even for me.

"American Shaolin: One Man's Quest To Become A Kungfu Master" by Matthew Polly (Abacus, 2007): True story - the author dropped out of Princeton to learn the arts of spirituality and arse-kicking at China's legendary Shaolin temple. Oh, to live an adventure so incredible (he stayed two years!) and set it down so lucidly. I don't care how busy you are, you WILL rip through this yarn within 24 hours.

Absent friends

CM has his first runs on the board at Kamuke - The European Tour! (he's currently on a stopover in Hong Kong).

PB already notched up a couple of boundaries at Mah Sanctum (from Monte Carlo, of all places).

No idea why I'm using a cricket metaphor in relation to holiday blogging.

Saturday, September 01, 2007

As full as the last bus

I'd been wanting to visit local restaurant Lebanon And Beyond since Conan The Barbarian was a boy. Finally ticked that box tonight.

Cramped quarters, a bustling, extended-family atmosphere and the tucker just kept coming. I'd barely warmed the chair when the Irish waitress (she must be the "Beyond" part) presented me with complimentary olives, whole chillies and peanuts.

Half the nibblies were accounted for by the time my mixed platter materialised: heapings of hummus and tabbouli, lettuce, fried onion, fried cauliflower, a falafel, a lady finger* and four lamb shish kebabs.

The side of green beans coulda-shoulda been a main on its own - the vegies were served hot in a thick, spicy tomato sauce.

Did I mention the basket of Lebanese bread? And sparkling mineral water to drink 'cos they weren't licenced.

It's rarer than a Black Lotus Magic card for me to leave anything behind at meals except a gleaming plate and crumpled napkin, but on this occasion, some chillies, nuts and bread remained.

As the winsome lass cleared off my table, I grudgingly made that most awful of admissions: "I'm afraid I don't have room for dessert."


*Not an actual lady finger.

New snack city

Kettle potato chips - Chargrilled Chicken & Herbs

These are milder than the average crisp. (For maximum effect, the previous sentence should be read in a Yogi Bear voice.) The pleasant taste reminds my tongue of Maggi 2 Minute Noodles - Chicken Flavour, which probably means they're chockers with MSG. Same green flecks, too. Why is that colour associated with chooks?

Mars Rocks

A Mars Bar in a silver wrapper, with what the ingredients list calls "crispies" mixed into the chocolate. In the one I'm wolfing, it seems as if the nougat-caramel ratio has been altered in favour of the former. Whether that's truth or sweet illusion, it's surprising the difference the wheaty bits make to the eating experience - in a welcome way.