Dork Geek Nerd

"Rational romantic mystic cynical idealist"

Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Winking hoods

"Only losers take the bus" - The Fatima Mansions

As a frequenter of buses, I've observed a simple yet effective grift. Perpetrators carry two 10-trip tickets, one expired. After dipping the invalid pass into the machine, they ignore its beedy-beedy-beep alarm and occupy a seat. If the driver says nothing, then - barring random inspections - it's a free ride. In the event of an, "Oi! That's expired," they return to the front of the bus, feign an apology, and produce and insert the valid ticket. I see this at least weekly and it's hard to believe it's ever an honest mistake, what with the words "NO RIDES LEFT" automatically printed across a pass with all trips used. (Begging the question why anyone would hang onto it.) This evening, I witnessed a likely lad* attempt the trick with both "dead" and unused tickets clearly visible in his hand. He was halfway up the aisle when the driver called him back. He smiled the smile of the busted.

*Rather than perpetuate youth stereotypes, let's pretend he wasn't wearing a hoodie.

Monday, November 29, 2010


Were it not for Alastair Cook's double century, I'd still be leading my Fantasy Ashes league. You watch - I'll pick him for Adelaide and the bloke will be lucky to reach double figures.

Sunday, November 28, 2010

Graboids, shriekers, ass-blasters and El Blanco

I've always hated that term for chatting up, "tuning". I guess my PC sensibilities are offended by its reductive aspect. Recently, I pondered if tuning in this sense could have been derived from importuning (~to beg to an annoying degree). While that'd make the term less reprehensible - funny even - I'm pretty sure its origin is mechanical.

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Feast of St Joatamon

Between delivering stultifying anecdotes and armchair spectating (Newcastle United Jets 2 - LA "divided and conquered" Galaxy 1!), I managed to squeeze in the DVDs of unconventional break-up comedy "Forgetting Sarah Marshall", its patchy round-up-the-party-hound sequel "Get Him To The Greek", and "Rocket Science", a tale of speech impediments, unrequited puppy love and high-school debating. I myself was on the debating team in junior high and we were spectacularly average. Our contests were nowhere near as serious as the sort depicted in this flick, though. Dare I say it, they were merely an excuse to get out of regular classes for a while and go for a drive.

Alter self

My shoulder-length hair carpets the barber shop floor. The "dashing airman" moustache* has escaped the razor for now.

*Closer to Sid The Sexist fuzz, truth be told.

Friday, November 26, 2010

Apropos of something

An ace heading by m'colleague MW - "Mammaries Of A Geisha" - had me remembering the pseudo-historical melodrama that was her inspiration. Back in 200X, I very much enjoyed "Memoirs Of A Geisha", which I received as a Chrissie present from a girl I was sweet on. The novel was special to her, so it was kinda special to me that she wanted to share it. The bloom went off the rose slightly when she let slip in conversation that she'd also gifted a copy, that same Yule, to another of her male admirers. Privately, I wondered just how many copies she'd distributed. (Cue: mental image of her dedicating paperbacks on a production line.) I'm not casting aspersions on that splendid miss's virtue, but maybe - whether consciously or subconsciously - she was trying to enlighten us to her predicament as the object of mutiple desires. If you've read the book, you'll understand.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Dream job

Gave my notice this morning. Not out of any dissatisfaction with my current workplace (dig the peeps and conditions, dig the subject matter). It was simply that an opportunity came along - entirely unlooked-for - that was too amazing to miss. I'll remain at my present post until the company shuts for Christmas, approximately six months after I joined. However, I'm actually starting the "perfect" gig next week, on a part-time casual basis (increasing to f-t/c in the new year). Don't want to write any more yet - perhaps I'm scared of jinxing it. What a superstitious twat I am.

Wednesday, November 24, 2010


Arrived home to find a three-car minor prang partially blocking the street in front of my apartment block. No-one seemed to be injured or overly distressed, which was fortunate. One of the vehicles was a late-model Bimmer, which might prove expensive for someone to repair. There was a lot of discussion between the various drivers and passengers, as well as photographing of the damage in situ. Surprisingly, it was fully two hours before the nuggety tow trucks had cleared the scene (I stuck my beak out the window occasionally). Didn't notice any police involvement. Nice to imagine folks can behave reasonably in an awful situation.

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Per ardua ad alta

My greatest achievement in the past 24 hours was viewing every Katy Perry music video in a row on [V]. Poker pro Daniel Negreanu cameos in "Waking Up In Vegas". Who knew?

Monday, November 22, 2010

"H/P" sauce

I didn't expect nudity in "Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows, Part One", albeit as demure as can be and 100% CGI.

L: "Snowfall On Judgment Day" (2009) by Redemption - ta from ages ago, LA.
R: "Zaregoto - Book 1: The Kubikiri Cycle" (2002, English trans. 2008) by NisiOisiN - ta from eons ago, RS.
W: Colts @ Patriots. So close. Heartbreaking intercept.

Sunday, November 21, 2010

2010: The year I lost contact

Today was the ultimate Doctor Who Club of Australia meeting for '10 and I did not attend. In fact, I haven't been to a DWCA function since 2009. Why? In this case, I was feeling poorly and just wanted to cook a proper breakfast at a leisurely pace (ended up pre-cooking a couple of dinners, too), then laze on the lounge enjoying the replay of Liverpool versus West Ham, followed by the live telecast of the latest Ultimate Fighting Championship. But that doesn't explain my repeated absences from organised "Who" fandom. I believe the main reason is that, thanks to the infobahn (to resurrect a crap term), there's little new material any sci-fi club can screen that I won't have seen - or couldn't sink a hook-hand into if I had a mind. Which leaves two incentives for making an appearance at such meetings: socialising and merchandise. Without wanting to sound like Johnny Balanced Life, I reckon I get enough of those things elsewhere. I hope I haven't given ya the wrong impression - this isn't an attempt to bash the DWCA. It's just me thinking out loud about my changed attitude to something that was once a vital part of my existence. Also, to finish on an upward beat, I intend to continue renewing my membership to the club, 'cos its "Data Extract" fanzine is an excellent summary of news and rumours.

Addenda to blog entry "Dave Lister":
* PG has pointed out that I forgot to include "Ant Attack" (Spectrum emulator) under GAMES. Yes, really.
* My Cup streak is alive...barely. Put $20 e/w on So You Think, which ran third, netting me a measly $21. Mum did better, backing Maluckyday (2nd), while Dad went for Americain (1st). Sister AK bet on all three of our horses and won hundreds. I may be the worst punter in my family!

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Dave Lister

I never did file that report on my holiday... Happy to say it unfolded roughly according to plan. Spent time with the 'rents. Won a shot glass and had my name added to an honour board for scoffing nearly a kilo of cow plus chips and gravy (washed down with profiteroles and beers of the low-carb variety - wouldn't wanna get fat!). As described previously, though, the primary purpose of the break was to catch up with my good friends PG and DG. P. was technically working from home, but between his preparing documents and fielding business-related calls, we managed to play/watch a stack of games and movies. And during those periods when I was left to my own devices, I put a dent in his otaku library. Alas, it rained most days, preventing us from building the shed, but we did lay a few pavers one afternoon. That and regular walks to the shops stopped us morphing into gibbering slug creatures. For those who care, here's an alphabetical list of our and my chosen media (asterisks indicate titles we conquered) -

GAMES: the new "1942" (360), "Batman: The Brave & The Bold" (Wii), "Bayonetta"* (360), "Bit.Trip Runner" (Wii), "Endless Ocean" (Wii), "Espgaluda II"* (360), "Fallout: New Vegas" (360), "House Of The Dead: Overkill"* (Wii), "Mushihimesama Futari 1.5"* (360), "Tatsunoko Vs Capcom All Stars"* (Wii), "Tekken 6"* (360), "Typhoon Thompson" (Amiga emulator), "Wild Fang"* (MAME), "X-Men"* (MAME) and "Zing Zing Zip"* (MAME).

FILMS: "Feast" (DVD), "Ghostwatch" and "Ghosts In The Machine" (UK telly recordings), "Hatchet" (DVD), "Justice League: Crisis On Two Earths" (DVD), "Justice League: The New Frontier" (DVD), "Rush: Beyond The Lighted Stage" + extras (import DVD) and "The Social Network" (cinema).

PRINT: "The Books Of Magic: Life During Wartime #1-15" (comic), "Katsuya Terada's The Monkey King Vol. 1" (manga), "Retro Gamer #63-68" (magazine), "X-Factor Vol. 3 #1-15" (comic) and "Y: The Last Man #1-60" (comic).

(This unrelated quote was meant to go with an earlier post, but I temporarily mislaid it. Waste not, want not...)

"One wants not to spoil children's belief in magic. There will be plenty of time later for disillusionment" - Christopher Hitchens

Wrong in all the right ways

So, "UFC #123". My heart says "Karate Kid" Machida, the resurgent Hughes and Aussie hero Sotiropoulos to have their hands raised. My head begs to differ on the first and last, insisting Jackson won't get Evans-ed again and Lauzon'll be too wild/explosive, though it concedes Hughes has as much chance of effecting an ass-whoopin' or submission as Penn. And that, ladies and germs, is called hedging your bets :-)

Listening: "Freight Train" (2010) by Alan Jackson - ta, CM.
Reading: "Is That Thing Diesel?" (2010) by Paul Carter - ta x2, CM.
Watching: "Red Riding" trilogy (all 2009) - ta, SBS.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

Aestivating for the summer

I'm typing this on a brand-spanking Compaq Presario CQ56, which I bought for a song (Glen Campbell's 1969 hit "Galveston"). I tried to call the machine "Myfirstlaptop", but I'd got as far as "Myf" when the set-up skipped to the next page and wouldn't let me backtrack. Now people will think I'm obsessed with that buxom lass off "Spicks And Specks". Except they won't because when are they likely to clock my computer's name? Moving right along... I've already spent several hours expunging crud (trial versions - [shudder]), installing important stuff (Mozilla-ware, iTunes, Lemonade Stand, etc.), updating and customising to my heart's content. The only progs that gave me any gyp were Thunderbird and Steam, but they're both sorted for e(mail)s and wiz(ardry). Have to say I'm quite impressed with Windows 7. If my old desktop PC, aka The Big Black Box, turns out to be unsalvageable, I won't be shedding any tears. It's not like my body can spare the water in this bastard heat.